Don’t Judge a Book by Its Cover

Have you had things happen lately that appear to be horrible? I mean Chicken Little “the sky is falling” horrible? Relax! You are being invited to view these things differently.

It’s a little like the Wizard in the Wizard of Oz. Oz the Great and Powerful wasn’t really great and powerful after all. And perhaps, whatever your problem looks like (or series of “problems”), it probably isn’t as bad as it seems. I am not trying to diminish whatever you’re going through. Many of the things we’re having the opportunity to experience right now are in the category of what we would call “worst case scenario.”

But what if you chose to re-focus your attention to the things that are going well in your world right now rather than on the litany of things that seem to be going wrong?

In race car driving, one of the most obvious things to avoid is the wall, right? If you’ve ever watched NASCAR, you will find (and I’m not a race aficionado, so please, no letters about the details) that there’s a lot of wall on any given race track. So, if you’re traveling at high speeds, the wall is not what you want to run into.

I was at a Tony Robbins seminar many years ago in Maui where he talked about learning to drive a race car. Part of the challenge, he said, was that you go into it with the idea “Don’t hit the wall” – which of course focuses your attention on what? HITTING THE WALL. (Law of Attraction 101) He said that when he went out, there was an instructor in the passenger seat. As he began to increase his speed, the instructor started saying “Look at the track. Stop looking at the wall” because he couldn’t seem to take his focus off of the wall. Ultimately, the instructor ended up having to physically turn Tony’s head to focus on something other than the wall. Until that point, he was so focused on the wall that the car was headed straight into the wall. And that was a guy who understands and is an expert on the power of focus!

So back to your life. If you shift your focus toward what’s going right and really (this may sound crazy) ignore the badness of the bad stuff, you will see huge changes in what happens. When I say ignore the badness of the bad stuff, I mean that you should deal with what you have to deal with, but otherwise do not give the issue, person, occurrence any more of your energy than absolutely necessary. In fact, if you can, put yourself in a place of gratitude for everything else, for anything else. That will raise your vibration out of the low vibration of fear and enable you to even be grateful for the “bad” thing because it helped you to realize how much good you have in your life.

Sound ridiculous?

What if the purpose of the “bad” thing was to distract you or divert you from focusing your attention on what you really want to be doing, but perhaps you feel a little uncomfortable about taking your life to the next level? And what if it was YOUR energy that invited it so that you didn’t have to live in the biggest, most excellent way possible?

I promise you, I am not completely crazy. This is exactly what I’m experiencing in my own life right now. It has almost become comical. I am happy to report that I am now only freaking out for only a brief few moments before I’m able to re-focus. The power this has brought for me is indescribable! To know that the things that used to threaten me no longer threaten me. But more importantly, to know that all is really well, despite the illusion of scary Oz the Great and Powerful looming ahead. Look over to the left and see the little man behind the curtain and know that whatever it is, it’s not as bad as you’re making it out to be.

If you focus on the wall, you will hit the wall. If you focus on the road, you can drive along happily until you’re ready to stop.

There are no wrong answers. It’s your choice. Just remember you can make a different choice!

Shifting into New Energy!

Welcome to 11/11/11 (if you add the 2009 digits together, you get 11)! We have just passed the first 11:11:11 time of the day and have one more tonight.

What’s the big deal? I’m not well-versed on all of the meanings of this, but I do know that we are in the midst of a huge energy shift that seems to be asking us to get rid of the things that are no longer serving us. The new energy is lighter, thus, we need to be lighter energetically to be a vibrational match for it.

Are you ready to get rid of your stuff?? Chances are that you have had “get rid of my stuff” or something that looks like that on your list of things to do for quite some time. Now is the time to implement!!

Rather than this being something to dread or worry about, this is a time to rejoice. All we have to do is make the decision that we are ready to let go of our non-serving beliefs, stories, blocks, and even physical belongings. Then we take action to release these things. Simple, really.

If it makes you shudder, look at how you’re benefitting by holding onto your old stuff. I can guarantee you that you probably won’t need it one day. This new energy revolves around the idea that we are everything we need to be and we can manifest instantly whatever it is that we need. So, there’s no longer any need to carry around things “just in case.”

Sound scary? It’s not as bad as you think. Check out some of the things I have going on to help you shift out of the old and into the new at www.changewhatspossible.com/schedule/calendar-overview or sign up for my newsletter at the top right of this page to get more updates!

Finding Truth

Are you ready to allow more of big “T” Truth into your life to replace the little “t” truth you’ve been using to guide you? Here are a few steps you can use to make that shift.

First, seek Truth. This really means invite Truth to reveal itself to you. You don’t need to go anywhere to find Truth. It is always here. If Truth is what I’m looking for, I can find it. If I’m actively seeking to avoid the Truth, I create all sorts of drama, stories and intereference that keeps me occupied, but diverted form my original intention.

Second, deal with the issues that come up on this journey. When you have shifted into the mode of welcoming Truth, you may encounter resistance.

Third, be willing to allow the Truth to emerge in its own time if it is not ready to show itself. Forcing it or going after it will likely result in truth with a small “t”.

Fourth, validate what you find. If you are receiving what you believe to be true, ask if this is the Highest Truth. Often it will be a little “t” masquerading as a big “T”. You will know the difference if you wish to.

Fifth, accept the Truth and move along, embracing it. Allowing it to stop you in your tracks is not productive. Sometimes, what we find to be the Truth can be uncomfortable and not in alignment with how we have lived our lives up to now. Sit with it. Allow it in. Be willing to release the beliefs and blocks whose place this Truth replaces.

Sixth, surround yourself with others who are also seeking to align themselves more with Truth. It doesn’t even have to be people who believe exactly what you believe. Being around others on the same part of the journey is helpful. You will feel supported and may learn a lot from their insights. I often find that I can learn a lot from the experiences of others because I don’t have an attachment to their stuff. The lack of attachment makes it easier for me to see what’s going on and apply what I see to my own life.

Remember, however this happens for you is exactly perfect. There are no right answers when it comes to how you should embrace the Highest Truth. Your path is uniquely yours.

De-cluttering and Uncovering Truth

As the new year quickly approaches, I find myself wanting to let go of a lot of the baggage I’ve been carrying around. The interesting thing is that I’m running into all sorts of other people who are feeling the same way. It really is time to let go of the stories and beliefs and blocks that we’ve been hanging onto for ages – maybe for this whole lifetime and beyond!

Can you feel it? It’s your true self, longing to play big. It’s ready. It’s BEEN ready for a long time as you’ve been in your self discovery process. You feel like you have more discovering to do, but it’s chomping at the bit to GO!

Here’s where you can do yourself a huge favor. Start to take a look at what you’re ready to let go of once and for all. Is it the story about you being overweight when you haven’t been overweight for years? Is it the story that you let everyone down when you flunked out of school? Is it the story that you didn’t take dance when you wanted to and now it’s too late?

Are you ready to change what you believe is possible for yourself? If so, are you willing to let go of those old clothes (both literally and figuratively) that don’t fit you properly, that don’t look good on you, and that don’t make you feel marvelous when you wear them?

If so, say a resounding YES! out loud to the Universe and begin to feel the clutter melting away.

For the things that you feel really attached to still, you may want to spend some time considering whether to keep them or toss them. You can look at them and ask yourself why you want to hang on to them. Seek the Truth of why you want to keep the things that you’ve outgrown. Look past the stories for the Highest Truth. Once you’ve discovered how those things are serving you, you can make an informed decision about whether to let go of them or not.

It’s your choice. It’s your life. There is no wrong answer.

If you’re having a challenge getting rid of the physical clutter, work on the internal clutter. If you’re avoiding the internal clutter, try going through the physical clutter. Either way, you are opening up space in your energy field and in your life.

And wouldn’t it be wonderful to start the new year off much lighter?

For more information on upcoming workshops, sign up for my newsletter at the top right of this screen or check out the calendar page under “What’s Up” on the menu bar for this site.

That old stuff again???

Have you noticed that recently you’ve had things from your past crop up again? I’m talking about the things that you thought were over, finished, complete, done with? Lately, I’ve had many opportunities to revisit other times in my history. Recent events have been occurring that have brought back all sorts of memories, from my first year in college to my parents’ old house, to a couple of car accidents I had years ago. If you’ve had things like this happen to you, don’t despair!

It is my understanding that these events, moments, flashes of “old home week”, are coming to us to enable us to fully let them go. They are indicators that something in our energy field is still hanging onto memories from another time that are not serving us. It’s not that every memory about the time isn’t of service, more that there are some issues from “back then” that still hold some of your life-force energy. They may be preventing you from moving forward in the way you’re wanting to move forward.

I like to think of it as if I’m in a trapeze act in the circus. The old stuff is tied to the trapeze you’re currently holding on to. In order to make the smooth transition to the new trapeze, you must let go of the old one. Hanging onto both is not recommended unless you have really strong shoulders or a really cushy net! And even if you have a cushy net, do you really want to stop the journey and start all over right here in the middle of it? Especially when the next trapeze is probably the one where you’ll have the most fun and excitement and abundance and happiness you’ve ever had?

I want to move with grace and ease to the next trapeze. So… I release what comes up for me to release in a way that is most appropriate for me. We’ll be doing a little of this at my workshop on December 13 at Dancing Moon Books and Gifts in Raleigh, NC. I’ll be releasing and cleansing in a different way with Diana Henderson on December 20 at Dancing Moon also. We’d love to have you join us!

If you can’t join us, but you’re ready to let go of the things that are energetically linking you back to your past in a way that you are ready to release, begin by increasing your awareness that you are connected to the universal energy of the Divine or to all that is. Focus your awareness on events that have come up recently that remind you of a past experience or event. Look back at the original event with the intention of identifying beliefs or feelings that you may still have about that event. You may feel anger, fear, abandonment. You may feel like a victim. You may feel completely powerless. You may feel intense sadness and disappointment. You may believe that you deserved whatever happened to you. You may have taken on responsibility for something that you didn’t cause.

Whatever the feelings are, take note of them. It helps me to write as I’m exploring, but you do what works for you. (That way, I don’t have to try to remember everything.) Once you’ve identified the feelings or beliefs, explore how you feel about them today. Determine whether you are ready to release them right now. As you consider whether you’re ready, think about how those beliefs or feelings are serving you today. Do they allow you to play small and safe? Do they enable you to avoid making changes you know you need to make? Do they make you feel powerful because your anger is so strong that it drives you to be more today? Determine what is true for you. Ask yourself “is this the highest truth?” Intend that you are able to see the absolute truth if you are ready to do that.

Next, determine how you want to feel. Perhaps you’d like to neutralize the whole event by severing energetic ties to it. You might want to feel love and peace rather than anger and sadness, so forgiveness might be in order. (Remember to forgive yourself as well as anyone else.) You might want to change completely how you view the event and be able to look at it as a gift, rather than a terrible event you can never recover from. It’s up to you how you want to feel. There is no right or wrong answer.

Then, if you are ready to cut the energetic cords that are binding you to these non-serving feelings or beliefs, write or speak out loud “I am ready to cut the energetic cords that bind me to this event for my highest good and for the good of all.” Do this three times. Notice if you have reservations before or during the process. If you do, take a look at what you’re uncomfortable with. If you’re ready, now visualize the non-serving energetic cords that are attached to you and the event being severed, dissolving, going up in flames – whatever works for you to ensure that you know you have released them. As the cords are severed, see the entire situation, including yourself, being covered by the pink light of unconditional love, the green light of healing, the violet light to cleanse karma, and the white light of the Divine. See the light go in, around and through everyone and everything involved. Feel the peace.

If you don’t feel the peace, ask yourself what is still there that you are holding onto. Use that information to begin the process again.

Best of luck! It is my goal to enter into 2010 with less baggage. The new rules in LIFE are just like the new airline policies: it now costs a lot to carry a lot of baggage with you when you travel!!

Resisting Your Highest Good

Do you have places where you are resisting what’s best for you because you have your mind set on something looking a certain way? Lately, I have become aware of some of the places where I am resisting allowing the highest solutions to manifest. I’ve had visions of how I think something should look, and these visions have been set in stone in my mind. We all know that setting something in stone, no matter how wonderful we believe it is, only serves to ensure that it can’t happen any other way and be acceptable.

The reality is that it can happen in an infinite number of ways and be a million times better than the way I’ve imagined it! The reality is that one of those ways might be the way that enables me to make a contact that changes absolutely everything. The reality is that no matter how wonderful I think I am, I will never be as innovative in my head as the universal energy that flows through me when I allow it to.

Resistance always creates an energetic block. When we resist, the energy has to either flow around the block or if the block is large, the energy backs up. Imagine the rocks in a river – the water can’t flow easily downstream; it goes around the rocks or it backs up if the rocks are large. In the physical body, this manifests as discomfort and sometimes full-blown disease. In the emotional/mental body, it is the “stuck” feeling that we sometimes experience. In the spiritual body, it is represented by the illusion of separateness, despite the fact that it is virtually impossible for us to be separate.

The opposite of resistance is surrender. When we surrender to the highest good, the highest thought, the highest vibration, we allow miracles to happen in our lives. EVERY MINUTE, EVERY HOUR, EVERY DAY, ALWAYS. For as long as we surrender.

Often, we misunderstand what it means to surrender. We think it means to completely give up to the things we don’t want in our lives. We think of the white flag of surrender in battle. In this case, we are simply surrendering to allowing the Divine to work through us in the highest way. We are letting go of the desire that we have to be separate and wonderful and surrendering to the higher desire to be connected to all that is and be magnificent! Sometimes it is a challenge. Our ego wants to feel important and special, and it can feel threatened when we entertain the idea of surrendering to the Divine.

It is important that we not make the ego the trendy new version of the devil. We are better served to partner with the ego and enlist it in the job of surrendering. It will help us if we partner with it. When all of the team members are moving in the same direction, there is no resistance. There is only flow.

We can choose to go with the flow, or we can choose to go against it. But when we choose to go against it, we become like the rocks in a river. As the water flows over their resistant points and edges, it smooths them over time. The energy of the flow is powerful. Though it might not take us with it if we resist, it will eventually smooth the edges to allow everything to be softer and gentler.

Either way, whatever we choose, it’s a beautiful thing.

What is your unique gift?

I know a lot of people who are searching to understand their purpose and identify the gift that is uniquely theirs to express in the world. Sometimes this journey can be frustrating and painful, leading us to the point where we begin to question whether we will ever know our purpose.

What if we simply take comfort in knowing that there is something that is uniquely ours to give? And what if knowing that is all that matters? It might allow us to move through our days and our lives with less judgment toward ourselves. Wouldn’t it be easier to know that every single thing that you do or experience is in service to your expression of your unique gift? Everything that happens is necessary for you to bring about the nuances of your uniqueness.

The reality is that we couldn’t be who we are now if we hadn’t been who we were then. And we can’t give our gift if we aren’t who we are now and even who we are becoming. It is all perfect. All of it. Every single piece. From the burnt dinner to the spot on your sweater that makes you feel compassion rather than judgment for someone else who has a spot on their sweater. From the 5-minute rant about how your television provider has called for the 10th time to find out why you canceled your service to the wiping away of a tear from the face of a child. Or from the face of an adult. Or from your own face.

All of it… every part is good. And when we appreciate all the parts of us, we open ourselves to appreciate all the parts of others. When we do that, the world changes, and it changes radically. Breath by breath. Action by action. Thought by thought. Touch by touch. Every single energetic impulse changes the course of the world. And every single energetic impulse begins inside of us.

So, don’t spend any more time wondering if some day you will change the world. You already have. And you do, and you will. Always. With every thought you think. Know that when you think your thoughts with the intention of bringing love and light and goodness to the world, it makes a difference. Know that when you focus your attention on bringing your uniqueness into the world in its fullest measure, that’s exactly what comes through.

Every fear you work through is a fear someone else can work through more easily because you have already done it once. Every baby step you take is a baby step someone else can take also. Every time you forgive someone, it is easier for someone else to forgive. And when you play big in the world, it lets everyone else know that it’s ok for them to play big.

And when all of the things that you do are put together, they form the gift of you.

Thank you for your gift. Now, would you like to super-size that?

Judgment

The interesting thing about judgment is that when we judge that it’s a bad thing, we’ve lost the point! Judgment is simply making a decision whether something is good or bad or scary or safe based on some sort of historical information.

Tony Robbins says “the past does not equal the future.” Thank goodness, this is true. It enables us to change and to become more of our authentic selves. When we know better, we can do better. If we base our understanding of the present only on what we know about the past, we are surely limiting ourselves and the world. When we let go of what we know and look at things more as possibilities, we set the stage for miracles to happen.

We can deceive ourselves by believing that if we keep everything the same, we will be safe. The fallacy of that is that when everything around us is changing, we are not safe by not changing with it. Our desire to rest on our past achievements will certainly put us in a situation where eventually we are forced to change.

Judgment isn’t bad, but it is limiting. As soon as we judge something, we have limited what it can become because we’ve energetically put boundaries on it. Whether good or bad judgments, each has the ability to prevent us from seeing the truth of a situation, person, place or thing. Our best bet is to simply experience situations, people, places and things as they are. Doing this enables us to experience all of the parts of what’s happening without the judgment filter applied.

It makes for a fuller, richer experience and keeps life interesting. It also keeps us from sometimes putting a square peg (new experience) into a round hole (past similar experience).

Try this: go through your day with the intent that you will be aware of your judgments. It’s a fun experience as long as you don’t judge your judgments.

What to do with an extra hour?

How many times have you said “I need more time in the day?” Today is that day! Each year, we have one day where we are given an extra hour. We generally refer to it around my house as “an extra hour to sleep.” When given the gift of an hour, do you choose to use it to be awake or asleep?

We have many hours in each day that we choose to experience in an unawakened state. Sometimes it’s easier to be asleep and operating on auto-pilot than it is to be fully awake and aware of what we are contributing to the world. Will you mindlessly watch television or read to get away from the problems you feel you are experiencing in your life? Or will you cultivate awareness and change your very existence by getting rid of illusion and focusing on truth?

There is no judgment either way. Whatever you choose is exactly appropriate for your path at this time.

It is only when you might not be experiencing what you want to experience that it might be helpful for you to take a look at how you are spending your time. Do you know what is truly important to you or have you slipped into the automatic “doing” mode, where you spend a lot of time doing things that are inconsequential or that are counter to what you say you want.

Let go of self-criticism. Don’t beat yourself up – simply notice what your actions and inactions are yielding and make changes in the next moment if that feels right for you. Whatever you do, it is never wrong. It may be leading you on a scenic journey to where you want to go, but it isn’t wrong.

The more you let go of the automatic self-deprecation, the more awake you are. As you live more consciously, you truly make the best of each moment, each hour of the day. But, if what you need is sleep, then rest is of utmost importance.

Awaken to the awareness of what is right for you in each moment, and enjoy that extra hour!

Healing the World Starts with Me

Over the course of the past several years, I’ve had the opportunity to be exposed to many different things that all fall under the category of “Healing”. Some of them have been health care related, others have been more on a spiritual level. The takeaway for me in all of it is this: I am responsible for my own healing.

I am responsible for making sure my car is running and in safe condition. Fortunately, for everyone who drives around the Research Triangle area, that doesn’t mean that I have to actually perform repairs on the car myself! What it means is that I am responsible for choosing a reliable mechanic that I trust to work on my car. I decide when to take it in, considering recommendations from the mechanic or the auto manufacturer. I decide what work I will authorize them to do – I decline some things they offer if I don’t feel those are necessary at that time. I decide when the car will be cleaned and who will clean it. I honor its need for gas and fill it up when it tells me it can go around 65 more miles before it runs out of gas.

In all of these events, I determine whether I feel like I’m getting appropriate value for my money, whether I trust the people who are doing the work, and whether I feel good about how my car is being taken care of. I can only judge the work they do by the performance of the car. If work is done and the car runs worse, I take it back in. If the mechanic consistently takes longer than planned to do the work or charges more than the estimate consistently – every time – I find a new mechanic.

Our healing is the same way. Years ago, we were planning to take my great aunt out for her birthday. She declined to go that day because she had a doctor’s appointment and she said “I won’t know how I feel until I get back from that.”

Sometimes, it seems that we have lost sight of the fact that our healing is our responsibility. Who else could manage it and coordinate it better than we can? We are the only ones who know whether things feel like they’re working properly. We can tell whether the solution we’ve tried has made a difference or not. We know how we feel. As with my car, I may not feel qualified to actually do the healing myself – whether traditional or alternative, mental, emotional, physical or spiritual – but I do have the responsibility to seek out the help and care that I need.

Around 7 years ago, I had a physician who attributed every ailment I had to my weight. I was around 100 lbs overweight when I started seeing her. My assumption was that she had my best interest at heart, and I could certainly see how some of the issues I raised were weight-related. After I had been on my food plan for some time, I went to see her with a sore knee, and she told me it was related to my weight. She was surprised when I told her I had lost 60 lbs since the last time I saw her, even though her staff weighed me each time, and each time she harped on my weight. I was over half way to my goal, and she hadn’t bothered to compare my last weight to my current weight.

You know where I’m going with this, right? That was my last visit with her. I found a new doctor who really viewed me as a person and who was aware of what was going on with me. That’s something we should do with every person who takes care of us as much as we are able to. If you have a belief that there’s no one out there who cares about you, look to see if YOU care about yourself. If you do, know that you are worthy of having caring people take care of you – whether it’s your physician, your massage therapist, your chiropractor, your oncologist, your surgeon, your energy healer, your manicurist, or your minister.

You deserve to have every person in your life be someone who has your best interest at heart. If you don’t have that, fire the person you have, and get another one! When you acknowledge that you are the person in charge, and that it’s your job to ensure you find the best people to do the work that you can’t do yourself, you can shed the victim energy and really put yourself in a place to heal.

Even if you don’t know where the best person to help you will come from, continue to focus on what you want, how you want to be treated, and that person will show up! I also used to have a primary care doctor who was focused on the mind-body-spirit connection. Nice, huh? It was nice, except that the focus started once the doctor came into the exam room. I routinely waited 30 minutes to an hour after my appointment time to be seen. (The 3 times I went if you can call that routine.) The third visit, after waiting an hour, I left just before the doctor was ready to see me because I had something else I needed to do. For me, a focus on the whole person includes how long they sit in your waiting room. The more I took a stand about what I would and would not accept, the more I have gotten exactly what I want. I didn’t make a big fuss about it, I simply voted with my feet.

We are powerful when we take ownership. We don’t have to make a scene, tell anyone off, whine and gripe to anyone; all we need to do is stay focused on what we want and how we want to be treated and keep moving toward that until we have it.

Sometimes, being in charge of getting the best person to help you means that you will need to make a choice that is outside of something your insurance covers. When you’re making those decisions, always consider the time and energy that you put into all of the visits and tests and waiting for things that are covered. If you can’t just make the decision you’re worth it, which is difficult for some people, really weigh the time, money, energy and results (rather than simply the money) and make a choice that is the best one for you. Remember, you are in charge!

Many years ago, I was seeing a chiropractor 3 times a week for an issue with my lower back. I could barely get out to my car some days before my back was “out” again. He was on my insurance plan, so I only paid a co-payment to see him. I had another chiropractor who I saw for some nutritional work (supplements, food allergies), but didn’t go to her for my back because she had a cash only practice. When my first chiro was out of town for the Super Bowl, I needed to go to my second chiro for an adjustment. She adjusted my back and told me that I should come back in 2 weeks. TWO WEEKS? She said I could come before that if I needed to. I didn’t need to. I found out that by going to her, instead of the other one, my back problem got resolved AND it cost me less than 2/3 what I was paying in copayments to the other one.

All of this to say that it’s not all cut and dried. If you pay attention to what’s going on and make sure that you’re getting what you want and being treated the way you want to be treated, you can rest assured that whatever issues you’re dealing with will resolve more quickly!

You deserve to have the best person in charge of your healing. YOU!

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